Rain, Flowers, and Other Death Clichés
by Blood of a Vigilante
Summary: It's been three years. She has to move on. She has too... One-shot. Spitfire with mentions of Traught


This is typical. So very typical. _Why _must her life just be so…awful?

Of course it started to rain _right _when she stepped out of her apartment. The flowers that she carries have lost most of their petals but at this point she doesn't really care. She's soaked, she's freezing, and to top it all if it's her husband's death anniversary.

_So _typical.

Artemis takes a deep breath before opening the gates to the cemetery. Out of the many times she's visited, this has to be the most depressing. Usually when she goes it's sunny, and there's at least one other person mourning their own loved ones. But now the sky is black, as if reflecting her mood, and there's nobody there except for her. It's just so empty, so depressing, so…dead.

Okay, bad joke.

She walks down the familiar pathway to the headstone where he's buried. She sniffles a little, closing here eyes and trying to force back the tears that she knows are forming. Artemis promised herself she wouldn't cry. And she _swore _that she'd keep that promise. But then again, not many promises are kept in her life.

She sinks down on her knees in front of the tombstone, not really caring that she's getting dirt on her jeans because the rain's already soaked through her many layers of clothing, and lays down what's left of the flowers that she got in front of it. "Hey," Artemis whispers, and then laughs a little at the fact that she's talking to somebody's grave. "I know you can't hear me but I'm going to pretend you can, okay? It's the only thing that'll keep me sane." She takes a deep breath. "Wally, I…I don't even know where to begin. It's been three years and I'm still in shock. Um, we found the man that shot you. Bruce said that he's going to rot in jail but…that's not satisfying enough. I want him dead. Or better yet, I want one of his loved ones dead. I want to make him suffer through what I have to go through every day for the rest of his miserable life. I know this is the part where you would yell at me for even thinking something so cruel, but—I'm dying inside without you." She stops talking for a few seconds, staring at the writing on tombstone.

_**Wallace Rudolph West**_

_**1984-2009 **_

_**Beloved son, friend, husband, and father**_

_Father…_

"Um…we have a daughter. Her name's Mara. She has your eyes. And your smile. And your hair. God, she's just a spitting image of you. I tell her stories about you every night and I've shown her pictures, but—but it's not enough. She needs you. _I _need you. But you're gone…

"Wally, I just—I miss you _so _much. I miss when we were fifteen and hated each other's guts. I miss our senior year in high school when we would just stay at each other's houses filling out college applications. I miss the hellish months that led up to our wedding. I miss waking up and the first thing I see being fiery red hair. I miss _you." _At this point, she lets out a choked sob that she's been holding in since she entered the cemetery. But luckily for her, the rainwater mixes with the tears and nobody would be able to tell the difference because her entire face is soaked.

Not that anybody's around to notice, anyway.

"You were always so protective of me. I knew that you would never let anything hurt me, but _dammit, _it should have been me! _I _should have been the one who was shot but you and your stupid stubborn ways, you just _had _to jump in front of me!" In a flash of anger, she lets out a strangled yell and punches her husband's tombstone—resulting in her cradling her hand in pain. "It should have been me…" Artemis whispers.

"The first couple of weeks I thought I was done with life. I was about to give up and join you but then I found out about Mara. And I knew giving up wasn't an option anymore." She laughs a humorless laugh. "Funny how the world works. Making everything impossible for you and yet not letting you give up. Life's a bitch, huh?" She laughs again, though she doesn't find anything about this situation funny.

"Wally, I have to tell you something. I know you'll understand but you're not going to like it. I…I have to move on. It's what you would want for me. And it's what I would want for you if our situations were reversed. It's just—it's been three years. I need to do something more with my life than go through the daily motions with a fake smile on my face. Everybody knows I'm just a hollow shell of myself. Even Mara, and she's only a toddler. I feel like a compete jerk, but…I need somebody in my life. Somebody who can deal with how damaged I am and be a father figure to Mara all at the same time. Somebody like you.

"It's not like I'll forget you. You'll always be my first and best love and I'll never be able to look at another man without thinking '_He should be Wally' _but the fact is you're gone. And I would do absolutely _anything _to get you back but I _can't_. So I have to keep going. I need to be happy for our daughter." She sighs, looking down at the flowers that have been completely crushed by the heavy rain.

_So much for respect for the dead. _

"I have a date with Dick tonight. I feel like a bitch for going out with your best friend but he reminds me of you. His smile, his laugh, his personality…you two are like the same person, you know that?" She traces his tombstone with the hand that she didn't destroy and a new wave of sobs washes over her like a tidal wave. "He was the first one who came to me after your death," She says in between sniffles. "Not my mom, not Zee, but him. He was just about as broken as me if not worse. We helped each other through it. We've become close and…and being with him just seems so natural now. Almost as natural as being with you.

"Maybe we're not meant to be. Maybe I'm not supposed to be with anybody besides you. But I have to try to bring some light back into my life. I'm sorry. I'm _so _sorry. But it's for the best, ya know?" Artemis gets up from the ground and dusts her jeans off in a worthless attempt to try to clean herself up. "I'll always love you, Baywatch. Don't you dare think otherwise." And with that, she walks out of the cemetery.


End file.
